DO FORWARD GIRLS FINISH LAST?

Wow I just realized its been such a long time since I wrote a blog post, It has been close to a year, and I really must get better about this, but what can I say my life is busy.

O.K. so the subject of tonight’s blog is related to dating but mostly online dating. The reason I decided to write this blog post is because I’m tired of being silent about the challenges of dating in your 30’s.  I am 4 days away from turning 34 and since about December of 2011 when I moved back to VA from CO, I’ve struggled to meet “the one”!  Back when I was in college when I met my ex husband I actually asked him out the first time.  Of course he claimed he was going to try to find my number from our mutual friend but in the end, I made the first move.  I guess that’s when it all started with me being forward and going after what I wanted.

Online dating these days is such a challenge, heck dating in general is a challenge and I particularly feel like it’s a challenge for Women in their 30’s but also for a Woman who shall we say, “knows what she wants” and “goes after it”!  There used to be an old saying of, “let the man chase you”.  I don’t know if that still exists today but I am posing the question, “Do Forward Girls Finish Last”?  You could say I am doing a comparison to that good old saying “Nice Guys Finish Last”.  Lets start with the later question before we get into the first one.

DO NICE GUYS FINISH LAST?

My personal opinion on this one is NO.  And of course I will explain why I think that. Nice Guys are the ones that open doors for women, they might offer to pay on a first date, they surprise you on your Birthday or Anniversary or Valentine’s Day with Flowers, they will cancel a night with the guys if your not feeling well so they can stay home and take care of you.  They are the ones that are your friend as well as your partner, they are sensitive, loving, and caring, and will always put you before the “bros”!  In my opinion those men are a CATCH!  And I don’t know many Women who do not want those Men.  So my response is, where are those Nice Guys, because I’m not finding many on the online dating sites!

On to the next question:

DO FORWARD GIRLS FINISH LAST?

Here is what I think, and I will give many reasons why.  I do think that forward Women finish last.  If you are a forward woman, you are:

1.              The one sending the emails to the guys on Match.com who Wink at you. 

2.              You’re the one who is giving that guy who is interesting in your number. 

3.              You’re the one asking the men out on the first date if you are chatting on Tinder or Hinge because you are interested in the guy and you don’t want the moment to pass you bye.

4.              You’re the one sending the first note after a speed-dating event because you really are interested and you are taking the event seriously.

The experiences I have had recently with online dating have been average at best.  And I have had a lot of people not stay engaged in a conversation after I ask them out for coffee or a beer.  I have had some people say we were interested in different things because I was asking a lot of questions.  When really I was trying to get to know the person, which is the whole freaking point of online dating.  I had one person recently tell me I seemed “ice cold confident” and that it was “intimidating”.  Dude, that one threw me for a loop, because he meant it as a compliment but in the end I have never had anyone tell me those things.  And so it made me wonder:

1.              If you are more of a “wallflower” and not “forward” will you get that smokin’ hot guy at the party?

2.              If you give the guy your number will he call you?

3.              If you’re “Forward” will you always “Finish Last” in dating?

I used to think those online dating apps were the best concept.  Now, I am very weary of them, even though I do use them.  I try not to take the whole thing so seriously anymore.  Which one works the best, I can't answer that because they all have positives and negatives, and recently none of them have worked!

However, if you are reading this blog, then one of two things happened, either you found it through my Facebook page, or I gave you my business card with the blog address on it, and you were curious.  But if it’s the later, I will say this, it is probably a good chance that if we were at a social gathering, it was my way of telling you I was interested in going on a date.  So I hope you want to, even after realizing I am pretty forward but apparently now I know that’s a sign of confidence.

Here’s to being 34!